July 8, 2018

What is Cocooning and Why is it important? 

Cocooning is a very intensive time of care where Jim and I will be the sole primary caregivers for Jameson. During this time, we will be the only people to hold ,feed, touch, kiss, comfort and play with him. It's recommended we don't introduce him to new people including family members and not leave the house with him. During cocooning we have to be intentional about bonding with Jameson and teaching him we are his primary caregivers no matter what! Our main goal will be to develop healthy attachments and boundaries as well as a deep bond to us. We must be sensitive to his needs and highly responsive during this time as well. Establishing routines will also be key. The best part of cocooning will be learning his personality while he investigates ours!!! It's absolutely critical we establish TRUST before leaving our house consistently. 

The one piece of advice Jim and I hear over and over again is be sure to cocoon. Families choosing not to put this practice in place regret the decision. 

Our Plan.......

We will be in Africa for 9-11 days as a family unit. Upon returning home, we want to control the outside world and distractions as much as possible so Jameson can begin to feel comfortable. Remember we will be dealing with a language barrier as well. We will put ourselves in his shoes and provide routines and proximity (recommended to be only an arms length away as much as possible- even when he's sleeping).  We want to give Jameson our undivided attention during this time. He will guide us through play and we'll show him as much affection as he can tolerate. We will also limit rules to health and safety during this time. 

9-11 days in Africa 

First Two Weeks Home- Alone in our house as a family unit, providing him with some 1:1 time with each of us toward the end of this two weeks. 

Third Week Home- Transition back to work one of us at a time. 

*** Our plans will adjust depending on the time frame of travel and how he's handling the transition***

Once we go back to work, we will still be cocooning in the evenings and on the weekends. It's recommended we do this for at least the first 90 days and again anytime we feel it's needed. Once we have a pattern of good behaviors, we'll start emerging! 

What we ask of Friends & Family during Cocooning......

The main thing we need from our friends and family is understanding during this time. We will share our journey and time with Jameson via our Whittaker Adoption Journey Facebook Group. We will post pictures and videos as often as possible. Thanksgiving and Christmas will most likely fall during this time, we need everyone to understand our need to be low key and limit traveling during this time. Our local friends and family can run errands for us or even grocery shop especially during the first few weeks! 

The first three months Jameson is home will be critical for bonding as a family unit. While we know it's going to be hard for everyone because you all care for him deeply, we are asking you to be respectful during our cocooning and understand the process. Trust us, we'll be dying for each of you to meet him as well! 

Prayer Requests: 

1- For God to prepare Jameson's heart for his transition to his forever home in America with us. 

2- For Jameson to know he can be who he wants to be! We have NO expectations for his abilities or interests! 

3- For guidance as Jim and I make decisions regarding cocooning and schooling

4- For doors to open regarding childcare once we go back to work. We need to find a babysitter with limited, very limited kids in their home until he goes to school this Spring. Several potential plans have fallen through. 

5- God to continue to provide financially as we are nearing the end of this journey 

Thank you for joining us on this journey, please do not hesitate to ask questions about cocooning. We will do our best to answer! 

             Love,
         Jim and Kelly